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or "living limp"  Show this Post

 
yeah… I really should have changed the title a few days back, since from here on we are really talking about life without a prostate – and "Post-prostate" just rolls off your tongue better than "prostateless" – and the latter gives the spell-checker fits whereas the former doesn't.
 
of course, the alternative of "living limp" is so very appropriate, but since I started using the 'P' alliteration in the titles, I better try to remain consistent…
 
so, having the catheter removed two weeks after surgery, might be seen as a milestone – but it certainly doesn't denote the end of surgical recovery – not by a long shot!  remember, you've got a 9-10 inch zipper down your middle that's still got a long way to go to fully heal… that thin skin scarred into an unrecognizable mess may be growing together fine, but don't let that fool you into thinking all the underlying layers of skin, fat and muscle are now all magically melded back together as if nothing ever happened.  The simple effort of trying to sit up in bed, should be enough to convince you that it's going to be weeks or months, before you're benching 200 lbs and doing 6 sets of 50 full crunches again – assuming of course that you could ever do that before your surgery.
 
some of my key recollections during recovery:
 
the delightful bouquet of colours of the bruising surrounding my surgical slice – it was so impressive, that I actually took a "selfie" with a 5 lb. digital camera (yes, we had them already back then – just not on our phones)… and no, I didn't post it anywhere!
 
one of my most memorable moments came around week 3 or 4 post-surgery, when I awoke one morning to find that overnight my left testicle had grown to the size of a grapefruit.  I was rather panicked and began shopping online for a wheelbarrow to cart it around in – until I was reassured by my surgeon that this was a rather "common" occurrence following prostate surgery??   Literally, it reminded me of those National Geographic's I'd seen when I was very young with pictures of children from India carrying their genitals around in wheeled carts.  Scary, but short-lived in my situation and not caused by worms as is the case in true elephantiasis.
 
and the most traumatic was a rather permanent state of things – alluded to at the end of my post a couple of days ago…  remember the missing 1.5 inches of that very elastic urethra?  Well, I don't know if this happens with everyone whose gone thru a radical prostatectomy, but in my case – the fact that the urethra had been shortened overall by about 1.5 inches, meant that everything "around" it, got shortened by about the same length… and since the surgery had all but guaranteed that "limp" was probably a permanent condition – I actually almost "lost" the little guy on a number of occasions, as that new "shortage" pulled almost all of him right back into my peritoneal cavity.  That may be a bit of an exaggeration, but I did begin shaving on a regular basis, just so I could always find him 😉