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sorry for bailing yesterday – but sometimes life just becomes a lot more "interesting" than you expected and the day gets away from you…
getting back to my story of life now "after" prostate surgery – one of the expected results that occurs to one degree or another and for varying lengths of time, although rarely permanent is incontinence.  In my case it was definitely an issue for about 4 weeks, and a rather cute recollection was the amusement of my 3 yr-old to see that daddy was wearing pull-ups just like him – well… not really like his… I didn't have a multitude of options for colours and patterns, like he did (I couldn't find Sponge Bob decorated pull-ups in my size) and for some reason, mine cost about 10 times as much on a per/unit basis.
and of course, the other much more permanent and frustrating result was impotence.  As discussed, my surgeon was only able to save one of the two nerve-bundles – but even when both are successfully saved – it's very rare that things ever "perform" as they did before and in most cases only some, if any level of "unassisted" erection is possible.   And when they use the word "unassisted" they mean without the use of drugs or implants… because let's be honest – a lot of us haven't experienced truly unassisted erections since we were… well, a hell of a lot younger than we are now.
the initial concerns regarding the situation are usually addressed with your urologist during the normal follow-up appointments… which begin with "give it some time" and then progress to prescribing a variety of forms and doses of the "little blue pill" and its relatives – until you and your doctor arrive at the sad but undeniable conclusion that nothing in the realm of oral medications is going to help.  At this point there are some rather unappetizing options discussed involving surgical implants which may give a permanent erection that can be bent up or down as needed (yikes) or those that can be "pumped up" (inflated) when needed from a reservoir also completely implanted.  I recognize there are thousands of men out there that have these surgeries, but I'm obviously not in the minority of men who become extremely squeamish just at the thought of elective surgery to that part of our anatomy – no matter how important we may think the result will be to ourselves and/or our partners.  Additionally these surgeries can be extremely risky and even if willing to take the risk, you want a surgeon with a ton of experience with these and those are not easy to find.  In my case – I never gave such a procedure a first thought… let alone a second.
so, what to do… give up…  not if you can get referred to a Sunnybrook clinic that specializes in such things – but the answer may be almost as terrifying as the thought of implant surgery.
addressing this strictly to those of my own gender… besides getting kicked there or having surgery there – what can you think of that would be the most distasteful medical procedure or practice to be performed "there"!   well, I know lots of folk who find the thought of this occurring anywhere on their bodies – in fact to the point of avoiding it at all costs – or actually fainting, if confronted with the reality of it occurring.  If you haven't guessed by now, it involves "needles" and I'm not referring to acupuncture!
there are drugs – actually a cocktail of a number of drugs that when injected into the base of the penis, can make things happen that no oral drugs could ever hope to do – and in my case they had some level of success.  It wasn't 100%, and it didn't work every time (I think needle placement can be key), but it was certainly enough to be functional.  however… getting used to "self-injecting" with a needle into the very object that one normally associates with pleasure – in order to "get it to work" is very unnerving at first and never really becomes trivial.
and for what?  yeah… you can still experience pleasure and even have an orgasm – but, don't forget – the prostate's gone and along with it all those connections it made and things it was there for in the first place – so, it's a lot like having the "dry heaves".  There's no ejaculate (which means no cleaning up ;-), but in some cases the result following orgasm is a very pronounced "burning" sensation, which doesn't last long – but can certainly take the edge off the earlier pleasure.  Of course, the whole point has always been and will always be to satisfy your partner – not yourself, so no matter the cost…   right…?  right…?